General bulletin board guidelines - Page 5

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  • Yes, you are the man!!! Go to the head of the class!

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  • Yeah, but it's a bit long. I doubt anyone'll read it.

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    27 8.71%
  • What's "Netickut" again? I'm confused

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Thread: General bulletin board guidelines

  1. #61
    BÝrken Member feldon23's Avatar
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    Could we PLEASE have a very small FAQ at the top of the Help board like...

    PLEASE use the search engine for a few minutes before posting questions.

    PLEASE do not post the same question in 2 places, you are likely to get an answer in NEITHER place out of our frustration.

    PLEASE if your server has just upgraded to PHP 4.2 and your scripts no longer work, rewrite your code to use $_POST['submit'] instead of $submit, etc. or ask your host to turn register_globals back on.

    PLEASE don't install Apache 2 and expect PHP to work flawlessly just yet unless you are a seasoned Apache/PHP operator. Apache 2 is still a CVS release and so it is a moving target for compatibility!

    Remember this forum is FREE advice, not your paid technical support staff.
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    Don't use $adderall or $_POST[adderall].
    Use $_POST['adderall']

  2. #62

    ??

    heheh, i was wondering what a LART was? lol
    if($homework_due == "Yes")
    {
       print("GAAAAAAAAAH!!!");
    }
    else
    {
       print("pheeewww....");
    }

  3. #63
    Has a PhD in Horribleness Elizabeth's Avatar
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    LART: Luser Attitude Readjustment Tool.
    Luser: Loser/User (i.e., peons not working in IT that don't really understand what a com-pu-ter is for)

    Usage: "I've got a pink polka-dotted LART that I will beat you with continuously if you ever delete the entire directory of client files again!"

    "LART" can also be used as a verb, as in "I'm going to LART you for deleting our entire directory of client files."

    hth!

    -Elizabeth

  4. #64
    Settled 4 red convertible dalecosp's Avatar
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    Originally posted by Elizabeth
    Usage: "I've got a pink polka-dotted LART that I will beat you with continuously if you ever delete the entire directory of client files again!"

    -Elizabeth
    Hmm, 'pink polka dotted' means it's your LART, having a database issue with the engineers' wives again?

    from watson.org's version (BTW, who knows what up with Eric Raymond's version---I'm getting redirected to all kinds of gadawful Linux sites (heh, heh))...
    Luser Attitude Readjustment Tool. 1. n. In the collective mythos of scary devil monastery, this is an essential item in the toolkit of every BOFH. The LART classic is a 2x4 or other large billet of wood usable as a club, to be applied upside the head of spammers and other people who cause sysadmins more grief than just naturally goes with the job. Perennial debates rage on alt.sysadmin.recovery over what constitutes the truly effective LART; knobkerries, semiautomatic weapons, flamethrowers, and tactical nukes all have their partisans. Compare clue-by-four. 2. v. To use a LART. Some would add "in malice", but some sysadmins do prefer to gently lart their users as a first (and sometimes final) warning. 3. interj. Calling for one's LART, much as a surgeon might call "Scalpel!". 4. interj. [rare] Used in flames as a rebuke. "LART! LART! LART!"
    Also, I've heard "clue stick" over in BSD land...maybe he was the "Billiard Operator from Hell?"
    /!!\ mysql_ is deprecated --- don't use it! Tell your hosting company you will switch if they don't upgrade! /!!!\ ereg() is deprecated --- don't use it!

    dalecosp "God doesn't play dice." --- Einstein "Perl is hardly a paragon of beautiful syntax." --- Weedpacket

    Getting Help at All --- Collected Solutions to Common Problems --- Debugging 101 --- Unanswered Posts --- OMBE: Office Machines, Business Equipment

  5. #65
    Settled 4 red convertible dalecosp's Avatar
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    And I loved this:
    This metaphor is commonly elaborated; your editor once heard a hacker say "I smite you with the great sword Cluebringer!"
    So, maybe we should revisit
    this thread.
    /!!\ mysql_ is deprecated --- don't use it! Tell your hosting company you will switch if they don't upgrade! /!!!\ ereg() is deprecated --- don't use it!

    dalecosp "God doesn't play dice." --- Einstein "Perl is hardly a paragon of beautiful syntax." --- Weedpacket

    Getting Help at All --- Collected Solutions to Common Problems --- Debugging 101 --- Unanswered Posts --- OMBE: Office Machines, Business Equipment

  6. #66
    Nerd! mogster's Avatar
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    I've now read the rules

    Just mentioning it!

    knutm - never read the manual until it's too late

  7. #67
    Pedantic Curmudgeon Weedpacket's Avatar
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    Re: ??

    Originally posted by PHPGuru_2700
    heheh, i was wondering what a LART was? lol
    I prefer to characterise it thus:

    You ever see that classic De Palma movie, The Untouchables? You know that scene where Al Capone is hosting dinner and making his speech about "teamwork". Watch what he does with the baseball bat. That is a LART in action.
    THERE IS AS YET INSUFFICIENT DATA FOR A MEANINGFUL ANSWER
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  8. #68
    2($infinity) && $beyond BuzzLY's Avatar
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    Ah, yes.. but if you want to see a movie ABOUT LARTs, then watch Falling Down with Michael Douglas
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  9. #69
    Has a PhD in Horribleness Elizabeth's Avatar
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    So did you guys ever LART yourselves when you had a DOH! Moment ?
    -Elizabeth

  10. #70
    2($infinity) && $beyond BuzzLY's Avatar
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    Nah... Although I have had plenty of D'OH moments, I have never had a luser attitude (at least, not at the same time)
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  11. #71
    Pedantic Curmudgeon Weedpacket's Avatar
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    Originally posted by BuzzLY
    Ah, yes.. but if you want to see a movie ABOUT LARTs, then watch Falling Down with Michael Douglas
    Give me a big enough stick and a firm place to stand and I shall LART the earth!
    THERE IS AS YET INSUFFICIENT DATA FOR A MEANINGFUL ANSWER
    FAQs! FAQs! FAQs! Most forums have them!
    Search - Debugging 101 - Collected Solutions - General Guidelines - Getting help at all

  12. #72
    Senior Member ofSHIZ's Avatar
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    wait.. whats this about again??
    ofSHIZ

  13. #73
    Settled 4 red convertible dalecosp's Avatar
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    Originally posted by ofSHIZ
    wait.. whats this about again??
    Are you suggesting we're OT?

    Seems that in discussions of guidelines, you'd also have to make mention of what's outside of them, and what the consequences might be....
    /!!\ mysql_ is deprecated --- don't use it! Tell your hosting company you will switch if they don't upgrade! /!!!\ ereg() is deprecated --- don't use it!

    dalecosp "God doesn't play dice." --- Einstein "Perl is hardly a paragon of beautiful syntax." --- Weedpacket

    Getting Help at All --- Collected Solutions to Common Problems --- Debugging 101 --- Unanswered Posts --- OMBE: Office Machines, Business Equipment

  14. #74
    PC load letter... keith73's Avatar
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    Originally posted by BuzzLY
    hehe. Glad to see someone caught that LOL

    I noticed a few people don't think a guide like this is useful. I would love to get some feedback, either positive or negative, and perhaps some suggestions for improvement.
    The guide is definitely useful. The problem is, newbies don't usually read guides and FAQs and manuals. They just post the same question that someone else posted and got an answer too an hour ago. The biggest problem with newsgroups and message boards like this one is that newbies don't take the time to search first and ask questions later.

    - keith

    BTW - I did the cheezit thing, and now I just got crumbs all over my lap, desk, in the keyboard, and wait, how'd it get in my underwear?
    "Pass on what you have learned!"

    please read about using vbcode in the forums before you post your code.
    http://www.phpbuilder.com/board/misc.php?s=&action=bbcode

  15. #75
    2($infinity) && $beyond BuzzLY's Avatar
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    I agree with your assessment, Keith. I have to believe, however, that some newbies really do want to do the right thing. Most of the time, if I see someone committing a netiquette faux pas, I simply point them to the guidelines, and I get a good response. I have yet (on this board) to get a negative "go to hell" response to such a request.

    I also point them to the guidelines in my signature -- it is my hope that some will see that and think "oh, I didn't know there were guidelines... let me check that out," and will subsequently become better posters. It seems to me that we don't have too many problems here on this board. I have seen some boards where there is practically total anarchy!

    Besides, as of this post this thread has been read over 4700 times. That has to be a good sign!
    New to the board? Check out the guidelines
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