use the curl() functios to post the xml
$xml = "xml.data";
$ch = curl_init ();
$ch1=curl_setopt ($ch, CURLOPT_URL, "http://youserver.com");
$ch2=curl_setopt ($ch, CURLOPT_POST, 1);
$ch3=curl_setopt($ch, CURLOPT_HTTPHEADER, array('Content-Type: text/xml'));
$ch4=curl_setopt($ch, CURLOPT_POSTFIELDS, $xml);
$ch5 =curl_setopt ($ch, CURLOPT_RETURNTRANSFER, 1);
$result = curl_exec($ch);
if (!$result) {echo "<h1>damnit</h1>";}
curl_close ($ch);
where $result is the xml you receive back
then you put your xml response into an array using the funtion I writen at
http://www.phpbuilder.com/board/showthread.php?s=&threadid=10235030
then you do whatever you want with your parsed data.
Can I ask which project are you growing up ?