I feel so stupid, but I don't know what that is. I guess I'll just do a bit more reading and try to figure it out.
I think the refresh thing is stupid, but it is the only way I can get it to pass on the information.
Basically what was happening was when the "confirm order" button was pushed it went directly to www.paypal.com (homepage) and not the correct paypal payments page. But, if I clicked "refresh" before I clicked the "confirm order" button it would go directly to the paypal payments page with all the correct information.
For some reason the information from my shopping cart is not passed on to PayPal unless it is refreshed. Maybe I can figure out why this is not happening so I don't even have to use the refresh code. That would be what I ultimately would want, but it seems PayPal and osCommerce can't (or won't) help me.