Well, Webmin's actually pretty decent. It's basically a CGI app that has root access 🙂
As far as killing processes, you only have to be root if you want to kill processes that you didn't start. If you could have apache "own" the ftp server/start it, it should be able to kill it, or better yet, send it the hangup ( -HUP ) signal.
EDIT: just checked the ProFTP site (never used it - I last used VSFTP), and you can run it as a standalone server, and sending it the HUP signal causes it to reread its config without stopping.