Hi sneakyimp,
quite some time ago, are you still into this?
I thought about sanity-checking nested sets once, so maybe I can contribute concerning issue 2. some suggestions:
a) no gaps (probably difficult via sql only, might need to be done with php?)
b) no duplicates (should be possible with a self join)
c) if left value of an item is between left and right value of another item, right value must between these limit as well and vice versa (should be possible with a self join)
d) sum of left and right value of each element mustn't be even (probably easiest)
concerning #1: I don't think that the client hitting stop would stop script execution on the server (would the server actually notice at all?), but information being submitted twice may be a problem. I've seen attempts to prevent it with javascript - not bulletproof for sure, but may help to prevent accidently re-submitted data.
no good suggestions for #3, sorry.