I'm just half-kidding. I actually know what PHP is. And yet, I don't know what to do with it !
In fact, I know programming in C, Caml but I feel PHP oriented differently, like in Web scripts, and yet I can't get to understand precisely what !
I mean, when I open a PHP tutorial, it learns me variables stuff, loops, ... but I still don't unterstand what I might achieve with it even if I see all the url with a '.php'.
My point is : if I learn the basics I wouldn't even know what to do with them ...
For example, when I learnt C, I knew the uses, the objectives, the possibilities and it led me on the stupid mini-projects, programs one does to just mess up with a language to get to its core and understand its working "in action".
For PHP, I don't get any of this and that's why I never really passed over the first page of a PHP tutorial : because it always meant to teach me the same banalities ...