Thanks for the code, Brad. I've been trying this out, and I've had some success and failure. My success is that my template file now places the tags into any page that isn't the main page.
My failure is that I still haven't been able to define my main page as a variable, so thinking that my main page is something different, the template also throws the tags in there, too.
Here's my code:
<?php if (FILE == "/loadedmouth.com/drupal/index.php"): ?>
<?php print($content) ?>
<?php endif; ?>
<?php if (FILE != "/loadedmouth.com/drupal/index.php"): ?>
<div class="node sticky">
<?php print($content) ?>
</div>
<?php endif; ?>
"loadedmouth.com" is the actual directory on my server, not just the URL. I've also tried "../../index.php", "http://loadedmouth.com/drupal/index.php", and simply "index.php".
How Drupal works is when the URL is accessed (in this case, http://loadedmouth.com/drupal), it goes to index.php, which then checks to see what theme I'm running and makes a call to that file. Right now, located under the drupal directory are themes/box_grey. In box_grey, that's where Drupal accesses my template file, page.tpl.php.
I'm trying to figure this out, but quite honestly, I don't know if I have made any glaring errors or not. If you can still help out, I'd really, really appreciate it. 🙂 Thanks.