Connect PHP to a remote MySQL Database

[nmphpwebdev]

have installed PHP 4.x with MySQL 4.1.x.
I am using SugarCRM for customer management. Sugar CRM is a resource hog, so I have had to put a development machine together.

I have the web site ( sugar CRM ) installed on one box and I have the databases on a completely seperate box ( because there is more processing power available ).
I can't have two sugar websites running on the same machine or I run out of memory ( and this is on a machine with 2Gb's of RAM).

I need to connect to the machine 1 (website machine) to machine2 (database machine). The only response I can get from the webserver is:
Warning: mysql_close(): supplied argument is not a valid MySQL-Link resource in D:\devsugar\include\database\PearDatabase.php on line 591 Unable to select database: Access denied for user 'ODBC'@'localhost'
(using password: NO)

I know this is a very generic error, that basically tells me that the website can't get to the database. I have added a database specific user so the user should be able to connect.

WHAT AM I MISSING???
I am pulling my hair out.

[bogu]

For server name did u use localhost or the name(IP) for your mysql server?

[nmphpwebdev]

I have used the server name.

Here is the connection string.
dbconfig' =>
array (
'db_host_name' => 'server5',
'db_user_name' => 'devsugar',
'db_password' => 'xxxxxxxx',
'db_name' => 'devsugar',
'db_type' => 'mysql',
),

[nmphpwebdev]

After a lot of patentience and coffe, I have this figured out.

I have to drop the database, delete the user restart mysql, the proceed backwards.
Make sure the user has full permissions or the sugar crm install will fail when attempting to create relational tables.
All is good.