I finally broke down and decided to get an offline way of programming with PHP, MySQL, and Apache. However I'm just not in the mood to get everything working seperately.
So this is a free program I reccommend with upmost confidence:
www.nusphere.com
It really is incredible. I use it on a windows 98 desktop (350mhz, 64mb ram) and I could not possibly be more happy with it.
All you do is download it, and execute the file. The first time I ran it it worked perfectly.
I've now set up MySQL to fit the usernames and passwords of my production server, and my file setup to mirror it also, and I don't even have to change a single variable to go from online to offline work.
When your done just insert the file you want to look at under your apache/htdocs folder and load up http://localhost/
You really should try installing everything from scratch for practice, but if you just want to program this is the quickest way to do it.
Took me 20-30 minutes for everything to work without a hitch.