Frank,
The following are the Win32 command line options for controlling Apache. The the purposes of this example I'll assume Apache is installed in c:\apache.... change the path to reflect your setup (or better yet.... add the apache installation path to your %PATH% so you don't need to type it in everytime).
c:\apache\apache.exe -k start --> start the server
c:\apache\apache.exe -k restart --> do a graceful restart (waits for existing processes to complete)
c:\apache\apache.exe -k shutdown --> kill the server
If you have Apache installed as a service, the commands become:
c:\apache\apache.exe -n apache -k start
c:\apache\apache.exe -n apache -k restart
c:\apache\apache.exe -n apache -k shutdown
where "-n apache" == "-n 'name of apache service'". Apache is the default service name. HTH.
Cheers,
Geoff A. Virgo